Congruence is a term associated with Jerry Weinberg and Virginia Satir.

Having action be congruent with thought. Doing what you know you should do.

Having the Self Esteem to act in the way demanded by the situation. To be able to choose among potential actions. See Law Of Requisite Variety.

Appearing on the outside the same way you feel inside. (see Authent Icity, Human Voice, Coher Ence)

Avoiding blaming, placating, being superreasonable, loving/hating (that probably sounds stupid, think of it kinda like bias), irrelevance.

"The relationships that succeed can be described simply. Within the organization, the veterans work as a team, are open with each other, demonstrate their presence as individuals, and show their respect and esteem for each other. They treat each other as unique, are aware of and build on their sameness, and grow and learn from their differences. They model (demonstrate) the behaviors and values they wish to teach to their new employees." (tweaked quote from Virginia Satir) (Engage Ment)

Classifying organizations by their level of congruence (Quality Software Mgmt vol 1).

• Pattern 0: Oblivious. "We don't even know that we're performing a process."

• Pattern 1: Variable. "We do whatever we feel like at the moment."

• Pattern 2: Routine. "We follow our routines (except when we panic)."

• Pattern 3: Steering. "We choose among our routines by the results they produce."

• Pattern 4: Anticipating. "We establish routines based on our past experience with them." (few/no organizations get this far)

• Pattern 5: Congruent. "Everyone is involved in improving everything all the time".

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